greetings shareholders. this month I brought lychees for the meetings snack because they were on sale at the local asian mart and I thought they would be fun. please remember to sign in on the sign in sheet.
more serious talk incoming <3
so I am officially unemployed. yurppp. the writing was on the wall because I kinda felt like my contract agency was not. doing that much to place me in a new position. so while I had slim hope I kinda knew that they would let me go. would have liked more than two days notice! but it’s probably for the best that I am no longer with that agency. it sucks a lot for sure. but my frustration and anger has kind of coalesced into a steely resolve at this point. I’m utilizing unemployment resources. I’m relying on friends and family for emotional support. hell I even started volunteering at a local thrift store to get myself out of the house. not that I don’t have bad days. but all I can do is keep trucking.
That Being Said. until I have stable full time employment again I will keep posting my ko-fi in these entries. no obligation to donate; I have financial resources to rely on for the short term. but if you are so inclined.
may events
I actually had a lot of events in may despite being wildly depressed at times. most of it was prepaid stuff so I didn’t feel guilty from spending money.
at the beginning of may was mikuexpo! I had made a bunch of bracelets to hand out to people at the event and I did end up handing out all my bracelets which I was cheesed by. yayyy for socializing. I cosplayed astray module/lost one’s weeping rin again this year and had a lot more people recognize me compared to mikuexpo 2024 which was exciting! I still long for the hologram projections of 2018 but I think they blended the LED screen in a bit better this year. and connect:commune especially utilized it well by playing the MV as a background… miku looked so real it was crazy… I did end up crying during the concert because I got overwhelmed with the beauty of vocaloid… wow…. thank you miku…
I took a very brief trip to visit my mom in new york to have a solo visit with her since my sibling had gone up alone in april to visit. as per usual we walked all over the place and ate a lot of food but I didn’t buy much this time because. no income <3. I saw titanique on broadway and stagedoored for melissa barrera and she was very sweet in my brief interaction with her. I am a melissa stan since scream 5 and I actually discovered she was on broadway purely by chance when I checked her instagram one day…
I visited kings dominion for the first time in… probably like 15 years? back in like march I was thinking about seeking out amusement parks near-ish to me to conquer my fear of roller coasters since my overarching theme for this year is to do things that scare me. because I had felt too stagnant in my life. and also because I want to ride roller coasters with my friends in orlando but I never do… so randomly I saw that kings dominion had a season pass that seemed like a good deal and I got it. I packed lunch for my KD trip and only spent a little money on some snacks (because I was bullied/bribed into getting sweet treats by a family member…) and I rode four different coasters. none of the ones that invert. but one of the pretty tall ones! and I survived! and had fun! and look forward to doing it again! maybe next time I will go on one that inverts… I’ve been hyping myself up for it LMAO.
may projects
while I did have a lot of events in may. I didn’t… work on a lot of things… I did a decent amount of cleaning around the house, including starting my annual through room clean. and I did publish a new oc profile (bones, the last of my necromancer ocs to get a proper profile on toyhouse). mostly what I did was apply to jobs tho. and exercise. and volunteer. I mentioned this already but I started volunteering twice a week at a local thrift shop to get me out of the house and while it is a lot of physical work it’s the type of effort where I feel good afterwards. breaking an honest sweat, or something like that.
bingo update
I did manage to cross off two bingo spaces in may despite my low energy.
finish 6 oc profiles: I’ve shockingly committed to the bit of publishing an oc profile a month, and even got slightly ahead of my average… I’ve finished another universe’s oc profiles, and now I have to decide what to pivot to next… I wasn’t sure I would ever reach the bottom of my oc pile but I feel like there is a chance now….
go back to therapy: technically I started this back in april, but I wanted to hold out until the end of may to see if I actually stuck with it… for some reason I’ve been so anxious about going back to therapy and it really did take A Major Life Event for me to. get back to it. so here’s hoping I can continue.
I think I’ve kind of covered most of the “easy” things on my bingo card so the pace will likely slow down a lot over the next few months… I have some things in progress of course and there are a few things I could complete in a weekend if I really put my mind to it… but I’ll have to see if my energy allows for it :sweat:
you might notice that I’m not being super strategic on my bingo card when it comes to. actually getting a bingo. tbh I’m kind of operating under the assumption that everything will be done eventually so I’m not. too concerned with lines. but we are getting there!
may favorites
obsession
I’ve wanted to see this movie since quite literally the first teaser trailer. and I am very happy that it lived up to the hype. and on such a low budget… I’m kind of really delighted that instead of being a western depiction of a yandere it’s more so a body horror movie? to me. at least. great depiction of loss of bodily autonomy and the horror from that. and also how much nice guys suck LMAOO
walking taco (kbbq version)
went to an asian food fest with my irl and I got this walking taco from a local kbbq place that had a booth and it was soooo crazy good im still thinking about it. like the chips were honey butter chips, and I got rice, soy garlic chicken, lettuce, corn, sour cream, onions, and seaweed as toppings. it’s not even something that’s regularly on the restaurants menu so I can’t get it again… but it is better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all
backlot stunt coaster
out all the rollercoasters I rode at kings dominion the backlot stunt coaster was my favorite. the part I think I hate the most on roller coasters is the long ride up to the top of the first hill where you are just Anticipating the drop. but the backlot coaster straight up launches you out of the loading station so there’s none of that. and the initial corkscrew that the coaster goes into is intense without being Too Much. I liked it enough to ride it twice :D.
june plan
the theme for june is still. taking care of myself. yes I will still be working on job applications. but also I want to continue planning fun things for myself and taking care of my health so I don’t. spectacularly crash out while I am job hunting. as of writing this I had one interview already and have two more scheduled so hopefully something comes out of those…?
But Also Toxic Yuri VN Jam is this month and I do want to make something for that. I have had an idea rolling around in my mind but… I think I want to keep it a secret in case I don’t end up doing anything with it lol. watch this space I guess…? there’s also the annual ghost jam in the middle of this month and I don’t know if I will participate this time but. the option is always there. there’s also uhm. my own bl horror vn I’ve been picking at for 6 months now I will continue picking at. Maybe.
I want to keep working on ocs! I want to keep working on the ukagaka wiki! I want to start coding again! most important I want to succeed at sleeping 8 hours for a week straight so I can prove to myself that I’m not just. constantly sleep deprived and that’s where all my issues are from. I’m also working through my letterboxd watchlist again after not touching it for weeks lol. so follow me there if you want to hear opinions about niche horror movies.
happy pride!!! keep trucking along and I will too!
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editorial note: the day I am posting this I got an offer for a part time temp job so!!! things are looking up!